30 small things to brighten up the day

Dear friend,

In my last post, I was writing about my first 30 day challenge – about finding during 30 days things that I enjoyed just for the beauty of it, where I was in the moment and above all, that I am really grateful for. Some are just moments, others are things or people.

So here goes the list:

  1. Listening to a song, K.T Tunstall “Suddenly I see”, i think it’s a very positive and energizing song
  2. I was sick that day and my partner was cooking dinner, literally throwing the food into the pan. That made me laugh so hard.
  3. A simply beautiful sunrise. I love to watch the sun rise and set, the magical colors of the sky. Taking a deep breath. Enjoy. Be.
  4. Coming home after work, dancing wildly to some music like nobody’s watching.
  5. A glass of wine and a good book.
  6. A childs laugh.
  7. Simply cuddling up in bed on a Sunday morning.
  8. A nice dinner and a good laugh with colleagues.
  9. A “roadtrip” with colleagues can be quite funny.
  10. The excitement you feel when you are planning a trip and looking forward to it.
  11. Just being. Did you ever realise who much you can enjoy just being present, here and now.
  12. The feeling of being in a place that you love (I have been living for 10 years in Lausanne and I am still in love with that city)
  13. Taking a cooking class (yes, I looooooove cooking!)
  14. The feeling of waking up without an alarm clock and staying in bed just a little while longer
  15. Listening to a song you haven’t heard in a long long time
  16. Enjoying some nice meal that is home made
  17. A car with a smiley sticker on it
  18. The feeling of being happy for someone else
  19. A night out with the girls
  20. Spending time with my family
  21. A good hearty laugh
  22. Catching up with friends
  23. A walk in the park during bright sunshine
  24. The feeling of signing up for a course you wanted to take for a very long time
  25. Enjoying sunshine a little bit more
  26. The first breakfast outside on my balcony
  27. First Bike excursion of the year
  28. The fresh evening air that brings with it the smell of rain
  29. Moving my body – yep , feeling good after it
  30. A beautiful artsy cappucino
sunrise over water , seen through grass
Nature. Sunrise. Hope.

You might not agree with me on all of these points but thats ok. I simply wanted to show you that it is possible to enjoy and be happy with small things, because often enough, we are not concentrating on the essential things in our life.

Our vision gets clouded so much either by outer influences or by our busy schedules or simply because we don’t look close enough. We tend to think and focus so much on the bigger picture. We think that we must do this or have to buy that. But in the end, it’s the little things that give you the goosebumps. It is the little things that make up the big thing.

What moments did you truly and fully enjoy lately? Let me know!

Namasté.

M. 

Why Hypnotherapy might be worth exploring

I’m pretty sure you are thinking right now – wtf?! Hypnotherapy? As is hypnosis? As in “in a movie magician dude is onstage snaps finger and person falls asleep voodoo”? Nope, that’s definitely not the case here. And I’m going to tell you why. I consulted with an hypnotherapist for a few months and I really had some breakthroughs with it.

Hypnotherapy has nothing to do with what you can see in movies. It is not about falling asleep in a second, doing things that you can’t remember or being out of control in any other way. Hypnotherapy is a therapy – it is an alternative treatment for stress, phobia, breaking through negative patterns and anxiety for example. You are more of in a very deep focused state, as in a deep meditation. The therapist makes suggestions to you to reach your subconscious mind (that powerful little sneaky peaky that remembers everything, takes everything at face value and runs your life). But as with all forms of therapy, you also need to want to change and let your subconscious be receptive for the suggestions.

human in meditative position
Acessing the subcponscious mind.

What happens in a session?

You are in a calm environment. My therapist did talk to me in the beginning, about how I was feeling lately, what was good and what not so much. We then decided together on what we would be working on. I initially went to see her for my depressive episodes but we ended up working on much more that that, like obsessive thinking patterns, low self esteem, low self confidence and a lot of release work this concerning.

After we decided what we would be doing, I took a comfortable position in a chair, closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. My therapist would then start talking to me, making me relax even more as to be able to enter into this deep focused state. I would tsart by concentrating on my breathing and naturally slip off. She would then make suggestions on where I was, what I was doing. Release work included for example standing on a cliff with pebbles in my hand. I would imagine that each pebble was something that I no longer wanted in my life. Then throwing the pebbles away, over the cliff, into the sea, to be washed away and never to be seen again. When coming towards the end of a session, my therapist would then make me – mentally, that is – walk up some stairs. After having left the focused state, we would then do a quick debrief.

path leading into water
A long way into the unknown.

I always left her sessions feeling utterly relaxed, at ease and at peace with myself. Note that it is not some kind of magic where after one session, you can change completely and 100%. It takes time and effort, especially from your side. But if you are willing to change and invest and break through your negative patterns, than it is absolutely worth it.

If you have feedback and questions, I would love to hear it.

Thank you for reading.

Namasté

M.

My definition of happiness – what is yours?

Dear Friend, I could have started this post with a headline like “The ultimate definition of happiness” or something similar. The fact is however, there is not one definition of happiness because there are loads of them. Probably as many definitions as there are human beings on this earth. We are all different, we have different life stories, different philosophies, different ways of thinking. So it is only natural that one person doesn’t have the same view on something as the person next to them.

First, lets have a quick look on the etymology of happiness. In English, it is related to the late 14th century word “HAP” meaning “chance, fortune”. The German word “Glück” means happiness and chance/fortune/luck at the same time. And in French, the word “ BONHEUR” comes from “ BON” (good) and heur , which is derivates from the latin word “AUGURIUM” meaning fortune. Is does actually mean luck and fortune in a lot of languages as well. Interesting, isn’t it?

The Oxford dictionary defines happiness as “the state of being happy” and the definition for happiness in return is “feeling or showing pleasure or contentment”. Other definitions include “emotions experienced when in a state of well being”.

To me, happiness has more than one component:

  • Happiness comes with being at ease with one self

Oh boy. That’s a big one. For me, being at ease with one’s self is probably one of the hardest things to do. There is always something that I don’t like or that I want to change. I would (and still can) be so obsessed with thinking about this one thing that it drains so much energy from me, makes me so tired and irritable . Sometimes also, outer influences make it so very hard to simply accept us as the beautiful beings that we are. So being at ease with yourself is hard but it can be learned. It is an ongoing process, something that you can work on.

  • Happiness comes from acceptance – you cannot change other people

Yup. That’s what I think. You cannot change another person. I used to have usually high expectations of people ( ok I admit, I still sometimes do and maybe that’s a bit naive in a certain way) and would be or get angry when people wouldnt be as I expected them or imagined them. One good (and yeah, naive) example is that I automatically assume that people are friendly, good-willing. And then it sooner or later turns out, for some, that they are not. And then I would be sad, angry, disappointed. I would wreck my mind about what is wrong with me (why could I be so completely off track) or what’s wrong with people. At some point it hit me – people are the way they are. And it is up to them to change. If they want to.

  • Happiness comes from concentrating on yourself and not worrying about other people’s opinions

This one is a bit related to the first one. Speaking of outer influences that can impact the perception you have of yourself, in a negative way. I learned one thing now – people will always (like literally, ALWAYS) find something negative to say. No matter what you do, no matter how hard you try. People are jealous, people want to cherry pick. So it is your job to find the people who actually matter. Those whom you trust, who are valuable to you. Their opinions matter.

I hope I gave you a little insight into my definition of happiness. What’s yours? Share in the comments below or send me feedback!

Thank you for reading.

M.

You are not alone

Dear friend,

Do you think, sometimes, or often, that you will never be happy? 

In my last post, I have already been introducing me and the reasons for this blog. I dont want to tell you that you that it is easy and that there is one medicine for it all. Most of all, I just want to tell you that you are not alone.

I thought for a long time that I was the only person who felt that way. Because when I looked around, everyone else seemed to be doing fine. But that’s only the surface. Scratch it and you see the shininess comes down quite quickly. Dig a little deeper and you get to see a whole different story. 

I used to think that I am the only one who can not be truly happy and who feels like jumping from one emotion to the other – one second totally happy and the other totally sad. Or waking up in the morning, knowing immediately it’s not gonna work out today. 

teaddy bear on a wall looking sad

Does that sound familiar to you? One thing I have learned that far though is that no, I am not alone. You are not alone. It is ok to feel like you feel, it is ok to feel sad and have depressive episodes, sometimes for days on end. Don’t let anyone tell you “don’t be so weak” or “come on, you will be ok” . Acknowledge. Feel. 

There are ways, methods, things to do to make this situation more bearable.To get on the path of healing. To get on the quest to happiness, because – and there is another thin g that I have learned – happiness often also resides in the little things. And it often depends on our point of view. We are responsible for ourselves, not the outside world. 

We can change the way we view life. 

We can choose to be happy.

Namaste.

M.

An introduction to happiness

Are you sometimes feeling down and unworthy of happiness?

I am there. Often. So I feel you. And I see you. I know you.

How does it feel like to see everyone around you seemingly happy, smiling all the time, feeling good when you only seem to scratch the surface of happiness? It feels like you are the only person in the world – you feel lonely. You may have a person or two in your life who you can talk to, who seem to understand, but when you get home in the evening, after a tiring day at work, then what? No one is really inside you and can switch on or off some buttons that do this or that to relieve the pain. Only you are you. You are unique. 

You eventually start to ask yourself the question “ Am I made to be happy? Am I even worthy of it? Do I deserve it?” 

The next day, you feel better, because something happened that made you smile, happy even. But this moment is so fragile, like a thin layer of glass that can be shattered even by a feather. 

So there you go. I have been there too, am there even. And I see you. I know you.

two hands with friendly words hold a cloud with sad words

And that’s why I decided to create this blog. I want to express my thoughts, my experiences and share them with those on the same path than me. I called it a quest for happiness, because that’s what it is: a quest. An epic journey. Life. It starts at an early age. But it is never ending. Because it is an ongoing process. And why for happiness? Happiness is something very personal and private and different for every human being. For me, generally speaking happiness means being at ease, at peace, according to your expectations and terms and conditions. But I’ll share in one of the next posts some of my definitions of happiness.

I sincerely hope it will shed light into areas of darkness and bring more positive energy into this world.

Why? Because the world needs it. 

I choose to be happy.

Thank you for reading.

M.

The Journey Begins

Dear Friend,

Thank you for finding my blog and reading my post.

The main theme of this blog is happiness – with all the might that this word holds. It is not going to be just another website where I will post happy pictures and tell everyone life if always sunny and shiny.

Because guess what? It’s not. And that’s reality. And that’s normal. And that’s ok. I just feel that we get way to often blinded by an un-reality, that can put a lot of pressure on us. We get influenced so much by the outside world that sometimes, we end up asking ourselves if hapiness exists at all for us.

So I will be exploring the topic of happiness – definitions, influences, struggles, depressive episodes, tools, changes over time and much more in this blog.

Stay put.
I choose to be happy.

Sincerely yours,

M.

trainstation in the sunset, the beginning of a journey.
All aboard. The journey begins.